Man with dark hair and facial hair, looking over the top of his glasses

Warren Edwards bio

Warren Robert Edwards was born to Robert and Grace Edwards on July 24, 1974. Robert was an accountant and Grace a schoolteacher. They both continued working during Warren's childhood, and the boy was raised primarily by his grandmother Ellie, a retired librarian.

During Warren's childhood, he faced disciplinary action at school on multiple occasions. However, the complaints were limited to a handful of teachers who sent Warren to the principal for being fresh, difficult, or overzealous.

Following graduation from high school, Warren took a job at the library where his grandmother had worked, and he went to school nights, eventually earning his master's in library science. He met Alicia Masterson, an administrator in the county tax collector's office, during a public policy study group and proposed one year later. They were married a year after that.

Alicia quit her job after becoming pregnant with the couple's first child: Christopher Warren Edwards. Daughter Eve Grace Edwards followed two years later, and son Michael Robert Edwards two years after that. Warren always actively participated in his children's lives because he knew their actions directly reflected on him as a father and a man.

Christopher and Eve were good students in all respects until they reached high school. At age 16, Christopher dropped out and joined a rock band that tours the South. Eve experimented with drugs and was suspended from school on three separate occasions before she finally managed to graduate. She now lives with a boyfriend of undetermined means.

Youngest son Michael is Warren's success story. Michael graduated high school with honors and is at the top of his class at Duke. Michael spends all of his school breaks with Warren and Grace.

Warren's neighbors and co-workers describe him as "a holier-than-thou busybody" who believes that rules were made to be followed whatever the cost. They characterize him as fastidious and polite but aloof.

In the last year, Warren has made 37 non-emergency calls to the Yoknapatawpha County Sheriff's Department, reporting everything from traffic infractions to civil violations in his neighborhood. Among the dispatchers, Warren has earned the nickname "The Watch Commander" for his attention to the finer aspects of jurisprudence.

His most recent call to the YCSD was to report that Ambrose Garrett was operating a leaf blower in violation of Whitehall HOA rules and covenants, as well as city noise ordinances. The incident was resolved without an arrest, but the word that Warren had caught Ambrose breaking the rules spread like wildfire through the neighborhood.

Warren himself has a spotless legal record. He has never sued anyone or been sued. He has never held an official position in the Whitehall Homeowners' Association, but he reportedly is the first to arrive and the last to leave at every HOA meeting and function.



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