Man with dark hair and a salt-and-pepper mustache

Neal Caine interview #5

Sunday, October 31, 2021 – 3:50 p.m.

Neal Caine is a member of the Yoknapatawpha Players board.

Detectives Beckwith and Magee talked to him again at the Yoknapatawpha County Sheriff's Department.


  • Detective P. Beckwith
  • Detective J. Magee
  • Neal Caine

Detective Beckwith: A few more questions, Mr. Caine.

Neal Caine: This is getting old fast. How long can you hold me here?

Detective Beckwith: It's only been a few hours. We have all night.

Neal Caine: You're joking.

Detective Beckwith: Nope.

Neal Caine: What do you want now? Wait, wait, I'll answer your question before you ask it. No, I wasn't backstage.

Detective Magee: Very cute. No, my question was, did you say in your interviews that a siren went off just before the big zombie battle the day Scott died?

Neal Caine: Yeah, there was a siren.

Detective Beckwith: Was there one or two sirens?

Neal Caine: Um, I guess there had to be more than one. It seemed like it was sounding from everywhere.

Detective Magee: When you first heard the sirens, where were you?

Neal Caine: By the mobile lab's back door. As soon as it went off, I sprinted out the door.

Detective Beckwith: Why?

Neal Caine: Because Martin was also screaming for us to get out.

Detective Magee: Since you were initially part of the medical team, did you have any weapons at this point?

Neal Caine: Birdsall handed me a replica Beretta handgun when he entered the lab. If you know guns, you could tell it was a fake.

Detective Beckwith: Was that your only weapon?

Neal Caine: Yeah, but since it was a glorified cap gun, I decided to hide from the zombies rather than fight them.

Detective Beckwith: When you first entered what would be the battlefield area, did you see Scott or Woody?

Neal Caine: They were dressed like zombies, right? You couldn't tell who anyone was in all that makeup.

Detective Magee: Okay, in a different vein, was it your idea to be part of Anna and Janet's medical group?

Neal Caine: No. We didn't get to choose. I mean, I was okay with being in that group.

Detective Beckwith: Because you and Janet have a thing going?

Neal Caine: What? Ha! I don't date trash.

Detective Beckwith: You think that Janet is trash?

Neal Caine: Well, she sure ain't in Anna's league. I have enough money to be choosy, and I wouldn't be choosing Janet for anything but walking my dogs.

Detective Magee: Okay, so when you left the mobile lab, did you see Janet?

Neal Caine: She came out behind me somewhere. But I didn't talk to her at all, if that's what you're asking.

Detective Beckwith: She didn't run to hide with you?

Neal Caine: No. I told you I was alone by the humvee. All right, I think I get why you have an obsession with Janet now. She was acting weird that day. She did seem to be messing with the play.

Detective Magee: What do you mean?

Neal Caine: Well, she allowed a drugged-up Heath to stay in the play.

Detective Magee: Anna did too, didn't she?

Neal Caine: Yes, but Janet was the one to allow him to rip that arm off that corpse in the mortuary.

Detective Beckwith: So, do you suspect Heath wasn't high at that point?

Neal Caine: No, I guarantee you that Heath was tripping balls at that point. I'm saying that if Janet had steered Heath away from that corpse, he wouldn't have been flipping out so bad. Then after that, she goes and locks him in the quarantine room.

Detective Magee: I thought you said that you didn't know if that room had a lock.

Neal Caine: I don't know. But either way, Janet was messing with Heath when she knew he was already blitzed. It was like she was trying to ruin the show. I guess if we knew Heath crushed Scott with the wall when he did, we all would have stopped the show right then and there.

Detective Beckwith: Did you see Janet when you went into the maze at the end of the show?

Neal Caine: She was getting eaten by a zombie when I went in. She had caught back up to the rest of us at the maze but not far away enough from the zombies.

Detective Magee: Could you make out which zombie was eating her?

Neal Caine: Nope. Like I said, they were all in makeup. He had a dude's frame, though.

Detective Beckwith: Did anyone accompany you in the maze?

Neal Caine: Nope. I ran through it alone. I got to the evacuation point before anyone else.

Detective Beckwith: Was Denis there when you got there?

Neal Caine: No. Yeah, that is a good question. Denis wasn't involved in the show at all, and then, at the end—poof!—he's there with us all.

Detective Magee: All right, Mr. Caine. I already know we'll have more questions for you later. Hold tight, and we'll see you in a few minutes.

Neal Caine: This is going to take all night, isn't it?

Detective Magee: We'll see.

Interview ended – 4:09 p.m.



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