Monday, February 20, 2009 - 1:32 PM

Detective Armstrong and Detective Murphy of the Yoknapatawpha Sheriff's Department interviewed the witness, who was at the scene the night of the incident. The interview was conducted at the Yoknapatawpha Sheriff's Department and recorded on a portable tape recorder with the witness's knowledge and consent.

Detective Samantha Murphy
Detective Ted Armstrong
Fred Wallace

Detective Murphy: For the record please state your name and address.

Fred Wallace: Stix, Water Valley, Mississippi.

Detective Armstrong: Real name. We need real name and a house number. You do realize this is serious?

Fred Wallace: Whatever, Fred Wallace, 912 Stevens Street. Is that better?

Detective Murphy: We have asked you here today to discuss the night Blake Jenson died. We know that you were there when he was killed.

Fred Wallace: Yep, I was there.

Detective Armstrong: Tell us about the night and start with your arrival.

Fred Wallace: I rang the doorbell and Kade let me in. She was a hot little number, I asked her to take me to Blake. She led me to the game room and I told him I was here and ready to compete.

Detective Murphy: Did he know what you meant by that statement?

Fred Wallace: Listen lady, our meeting was prearranged. He knew exactly what I meant.

Detective Armstrong: Do not address her that way again. It's Detective to you. Got it?

Fred Wallace: Sure, calm your jets, dude.

Detective Armstrong: Back to the subject. You said your meeting was planned. When was this plan made?

Fred Wallace: (clears throat) A few days before I ran into him at McDonalds. I threw down the gauntlet. He said 7 o'clock Sunday night and the rest is history.

Detective Murphy: So, you walk in and the competition begins?

Fred Wallace: He was playing some video game so I had to wait for him to finish.

Detective Armstrong: What did you do to kill the time?

Fred Wallace: I hit on that hot chick I mentioned earlier, and managed to get her number. I knew she was the rhythm guitar player in his band and I figured if I played my cards right I could beat the little freak at Guitar Hero AND steal his guitar player.

Detective Armstrong: A real stand up guy, aren't you?

Fred Wallace: That's what they say.

Detective Murphy: What made you think this Kade would fall for your little scheme?

Fred Wallace: Well, I pulled her against me and kissed her within10 minutes of meeting her, what do you think?

Detective Armstrong: Did you beat Blake?

Fred Wallace: I would have but just before we were to start someone yelled, "Food!" and everyone jumped up like they hadn't eaten in days.

Detective Murphy: What happened next?

Fred Wallace: I went outside, smoked a cigarette. I went to my car and took a drink of my whiskey and went back in and talked to Kade a little, then back to the game room to get it over with.

Detective Armstrong: To get it over with? Did you kill Blake Jenson?

Fred Wallace: Yeah, in the few seconds that the lights were out I found him in the dark and strangled him to death.

Detective Murphy: Come on Stix, what really happened?

Fred Wallace: @%$! lady, I don't know! I went there to humiliate and beat him at the game, not to kill him. I figured he choked on his breadstick anyway.

Detective Armstrong: You were in the room at the time of death?

Fred Wallace: Yes, I was choosing my weapon. Don't look at me like that! My weapon would be my guitar controller. Blake was acting like he was 6, jumping around with that breadstick singing, "light my fire" to that little gal that works at McDonalds. It was pathetic. Then it was dark and there he was dead on the floor with his guitar and his breadstick microphone right there with him.

Detective Murphy: Did you notice anything that seemed out of place or odd that night?

Fred Wallace: Everyone there seemed odd to me. They were a bunch of losers. Oh, wait, the pizza dude was shooting daggers at Blake. Maybe he killed him.

Detective Murphy: Did the pizza dude leave the kitchen?

Fred Wallace: I don't know, I wasn't babysitting him that night ya know? I'm hungry. Can I exit now?

Detective Murphy: Sure, and thank you for coming in. We may need to question you again, so don't go far.

Fred Wallace: I don't have any big trips planned. Later.

Interview ends: 2:08 PM